Letter of Wishes: What It Is and How to Write One

What is a letter of wishes?

A letter of wishes is an informal document, stored with your will, that guides your executors and trustees without being legally binding. It supports the will rather than replacing any part of it.

The will is the formal legal document that directs who inherits. The letter of wishes is where the human detail goes: why you made certain choices, how you would like trustees to use their discretion, and the personal notes that would clutter a legal document. Because it is not part of the will, it stays private, and it can be changed as often as you like without the signing formalities a will demands.

Is a letter of wishes legally binding?

No. A letter of wishes is not legally binding, and it cannot make a gift, appoint anyone, or override anything in the will. Its power is persuasive, not legal.

Executors and trustees are expected to read the letter and take it into account, and in practice they usually follow it, but they are not compelled to, and a court will not enforce it. This is deliberate. Anything you want to be legally binding, such as who inherits or who acts as executor, belongs in the will itself, where it has legal force under the rules for making a will. The letter guides the discretion the will grants, which is exactly why it must never contradict the will or try to make gifts of its own.

What should you put in a letter of wishes?

Use it for funeral wishes, trustee guidance, who should receive sentimental items, and the reasons behind decisions that might cause upset. These are the things that matter but do not belong in a formal will.

The most common contents are guidance to trustees on using their discretion, for example when a young beneficiary should receive money from a trust. Funeral preferences and explanations for choices, such as leaving someone more or less than expected, come next. It is also the right place for wishes about sentimental possessions, and for personal messages to family. Guidance for a guardian raising your children, on schooling, religion, or contact with relatives, sits here too, since none of it is enforceable but all of it is useful.

What should not go in a letter of wishes?

Keep out anything you want to be legally binding: gifts, who inherits, who acts as executor or guardian, and anything that contradicts the will. Those belong in the will, not the letter.

If a letter of wishes tries to make a gift, it fails, because it has no legal effect. Worse, a letter that contradicts the will can create confusion and even fuel a dispute, so the two documents must line up. Passwords and account details do not belong here either, any more than they belong in the will, since a secure record your executors can access is safer. The rule is simple: binding instructions in the will, guidance and context in the letter.

How do you write and store a letter of wishes?

Write it in plain language, address it to your executors and trustees, date it, and keep it with your will so it is found together. No witnesses or special wording are needed.

Because it is not a legal document, there are no formalities: you can write it yourself, sign and date it, and rewrite it whenever your feelings or circumstances change. Keeping it with the will matters, since a letter nobody finds guides nobody, which is why storing the two together, for example through a will storage service, is sensible. Dating each version helps everyone know which is current if you write more than one over the years, and storing it with the will keeps it alongside the document probate will call for.

A simple letter of wishes template

A letter of wishes has no fixed format, but the structure set out below covers what most people choose to include in one. Adapt it to your own circumstances, and leave out anything that does not apply.

Letter of wishes
Written by: [your full name], of [your address]
Date: [date]
To accompany my will dated: [date of your will]

This letter is not part of my will and is not legally binding. It is intended to guide my executors and trustees.

Funeral wishes: [burial or cremation, any service preferences, any specific requests]
Guidance to my trustees: [how you would like any trust managed, when beneficiaries should receive money, anything you want them to weigh]
Sentimental items: [who you would like to receive particular personal possessions]
Reasons for my decisions: [any explanation you want to leave, for example why someone receives more or less]
Personal messages: [anything you wish to say to those you leave behind]

Signed: [your signature]
Date: [date]

Keep the finished letter with your will, and replace it whenever your wishes change.

Frequently asked questions

Is a letter of wishes legally binding in the UK?

No. A letter of wishes is not legally binding, so executors and trustees are not obliged to follow it. In practice they usually do, since it records your genuine intentions, but it cannot override the will or make a gift. Anything you need to be enforceable must go in the will itself.

What should be included in a letter of wishes?

Typically funeral wishes, guidance to trustees on using their discretion, who should receive sentimental items, explanations for decisions that might surprise people, and personal messages. It is guidance and context, not binding instructions, so keep gifts and appointments in the will and use the letter for everything around them.

Can a letter of wishes be contested?

Because it is not legally binding, there is nothing to enforce or overturn in the way a will can be challenged. It can, however, be used as evidence of your intentions in a dispute, which is why it should stay consistent with the will. A contradicting letter causes problems rather than solving them.

Do you need a solicitor for a letter of wishes?

No. A letter of wishes needs no solicitor, no witnesses, and no special wording, since it is not a legal document. You can write, sign, and update it yourself. It is worth making sure it lines up with your will, so writing the two together, as part of making your will, keeps them consistent.